HAZARDOUS MATERIALS DATA SHEET
ELEMENT: Woman
SYMBOL:
DISCOVERER: Adam
ATOMIC MASS: Accepted as 55kg, but known to vary from 45kg to 225kg

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES
  1. Body surface normally covered with film of powder and paint.
  2. Boils at absolutely nothing - freezes for no apparent reason.
  3. Found in various grades ranging from virgin material to common ore.
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES
  1. Reacts well to gold, platinum and all precious stones.
  2. Expolodes spontaneously without reason or warning.
  3. The most powerful money reducing agent known to man.
COMMAN USE
  1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
  2. Can greatly aid relaxation.
  3. Can be a very effective cleaning agent.
HAZARDS
  1. Turns green when placed alongside a superior speciman.
  2. Possession of more than one is possible but specimens must never make eye contact.